judi

I thought I had the flu. I spent most of the last week doubled up on the couch with stomach pain. It turns out it was a reaction to medication. I’m back on my feet now and feeling much better. I’ve been sitting here now thinking how wonderful a tuna sandwich would taste, but instead went in and made a salad and added tuna to it. Still not as good as a sandwich but much better for my diet. Once I start eating carbs it is like I can’t stop. The other night I wanted mashed potatoes so bad but managed to resist the urge. I came across a picture today of when I weighed the most. I put it up on the fridge to remind myself I am never going to look like that again.

I hope all my buddies are doing great. It will take a while to catch up on all I have missed while I was gone.

I was determined that I was going to post everyday but that hasn’t happened. At least I am pretty much staying on track. I’m not sure if it is the 5 pounds I have lost or just the fact that I am eating better, probably a combination of both, but my blood pressure is starting to go down. It is almost to where the doctor wants it. We have had such crazy weather. First we were snowed in now we are in the middle of a six day wind storm. Power has been going out all over the place. We lost ours Sunday morning for a while. I have been riding the exercise bike but haven’t been able to get out and walk like I need to. I was supposed to be done with doing childcare but now I am watching my great grandson who is 2 months old. That keeps me up and moving around. I hope everyone has a great week!!!

Thank you for the words of encouragement I have gotten. For those of you who are new on here at one point I weighed 300 lbs. I went from a size 28 to a 16 but am now back in an 18. I got up today and put on a pair of slacks and a cute shirt. I honestly kept thinking I would rather just get my sweatshirt out of the dryer and wear it but ignored the urge. Then this was one of those days that all I could think of was food. I decided to clean out the fridge and freezer and threw together a wonderful pot of low fat vegetable soup, no pasta or rice, just veggies. It was very satisfying. I made enough that I will have some for a couple of days. So I have made it through two days without cheating on my low carb. I had a nice shrimp salad for dinner with homemade low carb dressing. I have lost a couple of pounds so hopefully by Tuesday at my official weigh in I will show a loss. I hope you are all doing well. I know it can be done since I am still down over 100 lbs from what I was a few years ago.

For some reason I am really having trouble getting motivated on changing my eating habits. Before it was so easy. It doesn’t help that I have been sick and depressed and food has always been what I turn to for comfort. One change I need to make is that I have gone back to wearing what I consider fat clothes. I run around in my old baggy sweats, although they are no where near the size I used to wear. I need to start my day of by getting dressed in regular clothes and taking more care with my appearance. There is no reason why I can’t lose this weight. I have also pulled my exercise bike out of the corner so I have no reason not to ride it.

I am ashamed to admit that I have gained 25 lbs since July. There are a lot of factors involved, but regardless I need to get back on track. My health is suffering because of the weight gain and my doctor wants me to lose the 25 I have gained plus another 25. I started back on my Atkins diet yesterday since it has helped so much in the past. I am hoping getting back on BuddySlim will help me keep on track as it has in the past.

I have switched from Atkins to a 1500 calorie Slimfast plan. They have a great free website. I switched over for a couple of reasons. First of all it is less restrictive and I can still have my shakes. Also I am beginning to think that although I haven’t gained back all my weight like people have told me I would maybe the low carb losses its effectiveness after a while. Slimfast does a great meal plan and allows for numerous substitutions. I am still following a low carb plan but not as low as Atkins and it is more the type of plan that my doctor wants me on. Actually it allows more than I am can eat at times. I just started a few days ago so it will be a little while before I know how effective it is. I have also been undergoing physical therapy so now am able to get out and start walking again. I have bursitis in my hip and have been in a lot of pain, also have a pinched nerve in my shoulder but both are much better with my PT. I hope all my buddies are doing well and staying on track.

I think I finally figured out what is slowing down my weight loss. I was about to give up on my low carb but got out my Atkins books and reread them. Two things I found that I think are impacting that number on the scale are the fact that if you are getting too much protein in your diet your body will burn it like carbs and even though Splenda is no calorie it needs to be added in to the carb count. With not being able to get to the grocery store and keep fresh veggies in the house I have probably been eating too much protein, and I really haven’t been measuring my Splenda. I am going to focus on these two issues and see if that helps.

I have been sick with a nasty cold that is going around and have been afraid to get on the scale. I have pretty much been staying on track but have been laying around as much as possible. I will get brave and weigh myself tomorrow. I pulled out my Atkins books tonight. That seems to be the best way for me to do it, to refer to them constantly. Although Jim didn’t really care if I lost any more weight he knew I wanted to do it for myself and supported me in my efforts. We always knew there was the possibility something would happen to him and he made me promise I would mourn him and get on with my life. I haven’t done that and I need to live up to my promise to him. He would want me to be happy and take care of myself and that is what I need to do. I actually have a date this week-end. Of course we are going out to eat and I am still trying to decide where I want to go. I have gone online and checked out the menus at several places. I think it will be easier if I know ahead of time what is available.

I have gotten rid of all of the leftover goodies from the holidays that were tempting me. Right now I just can’t have them in the house and the kids don’t need them either. I have finally managed to fight off the depression that has been hanging on for the last year. I have set down boundaries for some family members regarding their behavior in my home and who they bring to my home. Without the temptations it is much easier to stay on track. I have plenty of fresh veggies for snacking since one thing I miss is the crunchy things. I am using the high protein low carb shakes again and they really help. For a morning snack I throw one in the blender with ice and a some coffee and have an iced mocha. I also use the shakes if I am really craving something sweet at night. I have come so far and I know I can make it the rest of the way it just seems a lot harder this time.

Maybe now I can pull myself together. Jim and I were supposed to be in Times Square tonight. It was the last of the plans we had made together. This year was supposed to be our first Christmas together as a family. It doesn’t seem possible that in a couple weeks it will have been a year since I got the message that he was gone. Sometimes it seems like yesterday and sometimes it seems like forever. I need to start taking care of myself which includes getting rid of these last extra pounds for health reasons. I still have a child at home who needs me. And if I don’t take care of myself I won’t be here for her. I hope everyone is doing well and has a happy New Year.